Thursday, November 15, 2007
Im supposed to be zzzzing now.headache. heartpain. roommessy. notgood.JUST got off the phone with B. haha, yes you are the only one who amazingly knows im still awake at this ungodly hour.What does it mean to be truly contented? many thoughts flooded my mind a while ago, and i was truly overwhelmed. i realised what made me smile werent the great big things which ppl did, but rather, its the small little actions which seem insignificant but actually mean so much. come to think of it, many things make my heart smile these days. somehow, the higher your expectations, the more you realise how much you lack. at times we complain, whine etc. but its probably because we fail to see from the other side of the story. i too, fall into this category sometimes. well given, they may be irrelevant at times (no correlation!); like for e.g. erm, you break-up with you boy/girl friend but then you realise, hey your toothbrush is quite beautiful...? (forgive me, it is a terrible e.g. but well...you get the gist.) my point is, we have sooo many wants that are still waiting to be satisfied. but face it, its not going to happen. take a good look around, and we'll probably see that life is quite beautiful actually.im no altruist. (believe me im capable of getting pretty much depressed just like the others out there) but at least i do believe in giving the world a chance. (whoa sounds like im some big shot haha) as in, open our eyes to see what life has to offer la. be glad for the things that make us happy, dwell on them. you know, coming from an all-girls school i was surrounded by ultra-feminists who gave me the impression that nice guys simply DONT exist, and well in short, they suck. haha well i never really believed them (although some came pretty close to changing to proving it) but i wont deny some of those 'values' got inculcated in me. but i mean, who am i trying to kid? there are nice and genuine guys out there. some of them whom i'll probably be missing dearly once they get sucked out of society and into this hole called NS. ahh, see how things change when you get older? hmm people arent perfect arent they. i mean, we're bound to change. so when we change, feelings change. situation change. relationships change. CHANGE. TRIANGLE. (you know, as in the physics way of representing 'change') haha well it has come to a point where accepting changes arent that difficult anymore. or perhaps its not the others who have changed, its me and myself. nevertheless, its nothing wrong that relationships with people fade over time. you cant hang on to the past forever can you. people move on. we have to get on with life too. no longer blaming others for drifting away, but rather ne thankful that we were once friends. with that thought in mind, im even more grateful for the fact that some still remain, and despite the varying degrees of closeness, each and every one of them is still very much a blessing to me.these thoughts of mine would probably change. but right now, looking back on the experiences ive gone through, i can truly say that i am contented.well. that was just a fraction of my thoughts.(:
Yours truly, Ms. Dino!
»» 3:37 AM
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